2013-09-27 / Columnists

Boyleing Points

New World Order
By Kevin Boyle

I’m not saying – I said I’m not saying – that women talk more on the phone while driving than men. Maybe that’s up for debate. I know, I know things get tricky when you make those broad (no pun intended! (I said it was tricky)) – statements. No denying, it’s a new world. Polls show that more women than men have tattoos these days. That doesn’t seem all that surprising but fifteen or twenty years ago? No way.

In the good old days you knew what from what. You knew when you were in a rough neighborhood. Now, somebody like Maria from the Sound Of Music will traipse right by you in those neighborhoods and an apartment in that tenement costs $2 million. Just saying, back then you just knew things.

Now? You can’t assume shite. Guys have earrings and man purses. Tiny women drive SUVs that could do long haul trucking. I got a message that a guy namedXOcalled.Andthatwasn’tsome Chinese name. It was X and it was O. It’s a confusing world.

Don’t get me wrong, I am quite cool with the oddball and the offbeat. (Yeah, I might be talking about you.) I like that things aren’t so rigid but, dammit, it’d be easier on me if some of my assumptions held up. I was in Waldbaums—which I used to boycott and will probably find reason to go again– but with Keyfood still down and out I’ve got to put my grudges aside. Anyway, this middle aged guy is shopping, yapping on his cell phone about … well, about nothing, about a lot of bull. He was in aisle 4 and made sure people in Aisle 9 didn’t miss any of the conversation. He wasn’t calling home to ask, “Honey, did you want 1 percent or 2 percent milk?” He was a having a conversation that made the Housewives of New Jersey sound intelligent.

I confess I thought this was a woman’s thing. Shopping and yapping. Another lesson learned. And yeah, I guess if more men shopped, there’d be more men yapping. God help us.

Boyleing Points: Rockaway is a place with a lot of crap and people protect that crap. And then they complain about that crap.

** A pennant race for Mets fans is watching the Yankees fall out of playoff contention. So enjoy the fall season Met fans (yeah, you Dennis O’Connor).

**Please go to the Stop FEMA Now rally in Broad Channel. Flood insurance is a coming train wreck. This is a chance to be proactive. Our reps need to see people. Hey, gyms and auditoriums are filled for school plays. This one’s for the kids, too. It’s for our future. So please, give Rockaway half an hour. See you at 12-noon, American Legion, 209 Cross Bay Boulevard, near the ball field right before the bird sanctuary.

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