The Inner Voice
What have you learned in the last six months from our hurricane Sandy experience? We’ve all had different experiences in the crisis. Although some days felt like they were more than I could take, I try to remember that I am still in control of myself, and I have the ability to bring in positive energy and joy because I choose to. Nothing special happened to me today, but I can look around and enjoy the beach and bring in good feelings. I have felt very angry at certain business people, but I cannot let that dominate my overall feelings. After a brief emotional, stressful experience, I stop and remind myself that this too shall pass, and I should be able to feel good inside.
My lack of ability to control most of what was and is occurring around me with insurance and breaking things and rebuilding has been tough to relax about. When people said they would show up and didn’t or decided that they needed more money, I felt terrible over their lack of integrity. But, slowly, things are moving forward and lessons are learned.
I have learned to be very flexible. If not now, then it will happen tomorrow. My timing is always that I want it now so then I know that whatever it is turned out okay. That has been an impossibility here. Everything is taking longer than I wanted and things that I thought were done came back again and again. I thought my public adjustors would be a help but they turned out to be a hindrance. I thought things were broken and fixed and then more work needed to be done. I thought someone was good to hire, but then turned out to be very irresponsible.
I have learned to have faith in a higher power, God. There were so many occasions where I could not see the way and the answer came sometimes in direct help. I truly have learned that so many of the events that happened have been strengthening and often rewarding.
I have let go of timing and outcomes. I truly can control only myself, and for a while, I had so much congestion, I felt I couldn’t even control me. So now I can say that the only thing I can certainly control is my attitude. I choose joy and seeing and focusing on what is good and beautiful. I know I have to deal with the rest, but if I keep on going, a helpful person will materialize or the job will get done and “this too shall pass.” I try to keep the big picture of what I ultimately want, and then let it materialize at its own pace.