2013-04-19 / Columnists


A Rose By Any Other Name
By Eileen Hodges

If you read the column last week you know my quandary of what to call my boyfriend/significant other/ domestic partner. I am searching for a word for all of us to use to describe those whom we love and live with and yet do not share common DNA or a marriage license.

I did a shout-out to readers and got a few possible contenders. Dennis thinks “my brandy” might be a decent choice. “Brandy, you’re a fine girl, what a good wife you would be...” He uses the song for inspiration but I’m not so sure, Dennis. Brandy fends off advances from all the sailors while getting them drunked up and the one sailor she loves says but my lady is the sea. Sounds like the quintessential love ‘em and leave ‘em type. Might not go over too well with the AA set, either, but I like the ring of it. “I’m goin’ out tonight with my brandy.”

Donna thinks just the simple my guy or my girl should suffice. It is rather cute but there are problems. That is actually how the boyfriend etc. refers to me once in a while at work, or to new acquaintances, but they usually say something like “oh, your daughter?” or “Aren’t you too old to have a girl that you call a girl?”

I am amazed nothing has caught on yet. It only took a few years for people to really start using Ms. in the early 70’s after it lay about unused since the 17th century, so why haven’t we come up with anything that can stick? Why isn’t there a name for our live-in roses that we care for and love and partner with, no matter the gender?

Never fear, take heart! Phillip might have come to my rescue from the dregs of linguistic servitude in my significant otherhood; what do you think of these? Our friend Phillip has come up with a meld of partner and love/heart in heartner. Or my personal favorite, coheart .…that delicious blend of love, cohort, and the prefix co, meaning together, jointly, mutually. It has the hint of cohabitation while sharin’ the love. Thanks Phillip! My coheart and I thank you!

Spread the word Rockaways. Send coheart out in little notes in metaphoric bottles from our glorious waves to that of the rest of the world. We can go down in history for something other than she-who-must-not-be-named… eileenrockbeach@gmail.com

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