2012-05-11 / Columnists

The Inner Voice

Commentary by Marilyn Gelfand

We all know how we face events and things we need to do in our lives. Are you a perfectionist? Do you need to get it right every time? Must it be done just so on the first try? Many of us pride ourselves on our ability to be smart and to have a great ability to carry out what needs to be done. But, is there room for the ideas of others who may have a different idea of how things should be handled? Do you allow yourself to make mistakes? What happens when you do create a mess?

Sometimes when we have a need to be perfect, if we are not, we just give up and move on to something else. For example, if you decide you have to have all A’s in school or you have to lose 20 pounds this month, you may fall short of your expectations. Can you still keep putting that one foot in front of the other or do you just stop? Do you see that you are still moving forward even if it is not as fast as you had hoped?

It is important to realize that progress is being made even if it is happening differently than you hoped.

Life has many twists and turns, and we may not be going in a straight line, but we are moving forward. If we just keep on going, we can arrive at our destination or perhaps a new better one. There is no need to get discouraged because things did not go the way we hoped. Marty, a friend of mine, says, if you wanted to eat healthy and then just pig out instead, it is like a car having a flat tire. If you get all discouraged and stop yourself from eating healthy in your next meal, then it is like having four flat tires. It is even more difficult to turn your mind around once you start wallowing in negative thoughts of self-pity or make excuses. If you have blown what you set your mind on, just stop and start fresh. Do it anyway. You will arrive at your destination.

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