No Love For Far Rockaway
The McDonald’s food chain has many loyal customers in the Far Rockaway section of Councilman James Sanders, Jr.’s 31st City Council District.
Sadly, Sanders says, it seems they go unappreciated by the top brass over at McDonald’s Corporate. A new ad campaign in New York’s subway system encourages riders to consume McDonald’s iced coffee, or risk falling asleep and “ending up in Far Rockaway.” The ad makes sure to include the parenthetical follow-up: “Unless of course, you live there,” a tacit admission of McDonald’s heartless attack on its Far Rockaway customers base.
“I can assure the marketing boys over at McDonald’s that most people don’t wind up in the Rockaways by accident,” said Sanders. “They come for the beauty, serenity and entertainment that our peninsula offers, especially in the hot summer months when our beaches are overrun with visitors from Manhattan who flock to our shores.”
“Rockaway is arguably the greatest section of the greatest city on the planet,” continued the Councilman. “Far Rockaway is well known as the ‘summer home of summer,’ and by the powers vested in me by the people of my district, I am hereby banning Ronald McDonald from our peninsula. He can no longer walk our seven miles of boardwalk, or sunbathe on our 14 miles of beach front, and I better not catch him frolicking on a summer day in our cool, relaxing water.”
Concluded the Councilman: “I will, however, allow Ronald back to the Rockaways if he comes out to visit, by train, and expresses his love for our community. As a loyal patron of mass transit, I ride the trains and buses daily and I encourage Ronald McDonald to ride with me as we cross one of nature’s wonders, the Jamaica Bay, and go through the Gateway National Recreation Area to meet some of the best people east of the Rockies.”