2010-01-08 / Columnists

The Inner Voice

Commentary by Marilyn Gelfand

Our perception of how life treats us is what we remember. We often take the facts and put it into our own notion of how it was or how it should be. Life can be counted in days, years, minutes or nanoseconds ..whichever way our perception chooses to evaluate the passing of each moment. What is our path of life really? It is made up of a series of present moments each following the one before, and it becomes an unfolding process. It is an important big picture concept to remember.

When we are in trouble, it is good to remember that “this too shall pass.” When life is good, it is important to enjoy it because we can savor each and every good experience. Since our expectations color everything we think, we have to remain flexible as life has so many unexpecteds in it.

If you are in a relationship that feels so hurtful, you can ask yourself if you want to continue trying to make it work out. If you have had enough, you will stop trying and move on. If you are still hoping that things will get better, you can recognize that time passes and things may change. If you are willing to put in the work to discover what the problem is, you will have some time to try out a variety of changes as time continues. Things also happen around us that we would not have even considered. You may get a good response or with time you will recognize that it is no longer acceptable to keep going this way. So much is unknowable until time has passed with all its present mo - ments. Each step of the way has the power to alter our perception or course of action.

As time goes by, we realize that we control very little. The unexpected is bound to happen and combined with our expectations and hopes, it can be frustrating. The important point is that this very moment is brief, as they all are, and I have to make it as best as I can each time. In the end, life is just a series of present moments defined by ourselves.

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