2009-10-23 / Letters

Untied Nations… Terrorist and All

Dear Editor,

Did everyone enjoy that comedy show at the Untied Nations this week? Personally, I thought it was hilarious. Our president made a bril - liant speech as usual, but I don't know if I could believe everything he said let alone understand some of it. It was about as clear to me as his explanation of the health care plan. At least he looked good enough for us to be proud of… sort of.

As for some of the other speakers, I was completely lost. Maybe it was me, or maybe my lack of understanding other cultures around the world. I certainly could understand why so many took a walk when some were speaking. Take the tent men from Libya for example, that Daffy Duck was something else. I swear to you he had some brown curtain drapes wrapped around him that the firemen ordered me to throw out of my hotel 26 years ago, because they weren't fireproof. Thank God it was the summer. If he ever walked past the homeless with the fires burning in the barrels he would have gone up in flames. Not that that would be so bad, but not on American soil. We don't need the stench.

The little Caesar with the extra large shnazola from Iran made a speech good enough for a lot of people to take a walk. You don't need to know his name because it is impossible to pronounce anyway, and if you saw him once you would never forget him; he will never win a beauty contest. He makes our congressman Anthony Wei ner look like a film star. Con - spicuous ly absent were the oil bandits in bed sheets with red and black sweat bands keeping the sheets tightly wrapped around their heads. They are probably used to keep the oil from gushing out of their ears. They have made a mockery out of America for far too long, not to mention all the terrorists they breed and harbor, all in the name of the black gold that we desperately need and cannot do without. I guess one could say that if we need the product so bad we must take the entire package… terrorists and all.

JOHN BAXTER

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