2008-04-18 / Columnists

The Inner Voice

Commentary by Marilyn Gelfand

Our choices in life are based on what we perceive reality to be.

What we recall is usually triggered by something important within ourselves.

If we care about money, we will remember an event based on how much money was spent.

If we love nature, we may remember the same vacation, for example, because of how nice the scenery or the terrace was.

Reality is not our perception.

Our perception picks up something, but usually not the whole picture.

We may not know the circumstances of why someone behaves in a particular way.

We can't get all the sides of an issue, sometimes, because we are not exposed to them.

The important point is to remember that my perception is based on me and what the other person showed me of himself.

In addition to my triggers, the other person may want to be kind to one person and nasty to the next. People treat each other differently. The motives behind the actions vary, too.

Someone may be nice to get something from the other person. So, I know I am looking at a particular scene, and then I interpret it through my own lens of perception.

For this reason, it is so important to trust our instincts.

To interpret reality knowing that I am only seeing it partially through my own values and perception and then recognizing that another may just be showing me what he wants me to see can be very confusing. The key is to sense if we are picking up something negative about a situation.

If something appears normal, but our senses tell us otherwise, it is good to pay attention.

Logic is helpful in preparation, but it doesn't always have all the pieces available for interpretation.

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