2006-07-28 / Letters

Living A Lie

Dear Editor,

I read your article on falsified addresses at PS 114 with great interest because I and my two siblings were such children 35 years ago. I thought it might be an education for your readers to know what being in such a situation was like from the child's point of view.

Before I do that, I have a few questions for the parents, who I know believe are doing the right thing for their children:

What is the use of sending your children to a "better" school to get a superior education when in doing so you are teaching them to lie to get what you want, cheat to get what you want, and ignore/break the law to get what you want? While sending your children to a "better" school because you think a superior education will get them better lives as adults, are you thinking about the mental and emotional fallout of having to lie regarding something that is so basic as where you live?

My siblings and I lived with that lie for six years. And, we continued to live it during our time at JHS 180.

Finally, when I entered Beach Channel High School, I, not my parents, walked into the guidance office and had my address changed. I cannot speak for my siblings, but I can tell you that I was very lonely and always watching my back. My parents used the address of a relative who lived two blocks from P.S. 114 and made us believe that if anyone found out, especially the parents of our classmates, we'd be forced to go to the inferior school where the "bad" kids are, that being our regular neighborhood school.

So what was it like? Well, what can a child answer when classmates want to know why you get picked up by car everyday when you only live two blocks away? How am I supposed to feel when I never got invited more than once to play at a friend's house because I didn't (couldn't) reciprocate? And the ONE time I did reciprocate, my friend wanted to know where I slept and where were my clothes and toys (this relative had no young children living at home).

What do I say to the kids about where I really live when they wanted to know how come they don't see me in school? How do I answer the teacher when she tells me that my home phone number cannot begin with 945 if I live in Belle Harbor (true at that time)? What do I say to the assistant principal who is angry at me for showing up at school at the regular time on parent/teacher conference day when school started twohours later- and I only live two blocks away (she didn't know I was driven to school by my father on his way to work)? What could I tell my best friend in 7th grade when she was so hurt when she found out that I had lied to her for four years about where I lived that she became my worst enemy?

How much should a child be expected to lie so her parents can have what they want??? In case you think I turned out alright, just know that by outward appearances I act mostly normal. Inwardly, I am obsessed with truth and very strongly react when lied to, having issues with trusting and relating to others, and am always waiting for "the other shoe to drop."

So what can a parent do besides make their child live a lie? There is plenty. First of all, check out the schools where you live BEFORE moving there and/or BEFORE having children. That's right, plan ahead. Second, if you think the school where you live is not great and you can't afford to move, then do the next best thing: Become an involved parent and actively work for change. And lastly, if your wish for your children is to grow up to be healthy, productive members of society, then let your children know what an adult looks like by being one yourself.

SHERRI (SCHECHTER) MILLER

PASSAIC, NJ

Ride The Q21

Dear Editor,

I was one of the many riders who were outraged at the delays last Sunday when the bridge was left open and the broken rail the next day that left passengers stranded on hot trains. For years, the MTA has been rebuilding the tracks from Broad Channel to the peninsula and it seems nothing has ever been fixed.

But another alternative has appeared which has been a godsend. Instead of taking the S train from 116 Street to Broad Channel to connect to the A train, I've been taking the Q21 from 116 to get to Rockaway Boulevard. It takes me 25 minutes and I can transfer there and get a better chance to board an A train to the city.

The MTA, who has more information on their website, had added service on the bus line to every half hour but the buses have been empty. For people who want to shop in Howard Beach or find another way to get off the peninsula, especially when the train goes out of service, take the Q21. The peninsula has been complaining for years about adding more public transportation. It's a small step by the MTA and we can't let this opportunity slip past us or its back to the ol' drawing board and that's not good at all.

MICHAEL THOMPSON

Larry Shoots Memorial

Dear Editor:

I have recently become a Board Member of the Bayswater Civic Association.

Unfortunately, I did not have a personal relationship with Larry [Shoots} during the years he was active in the community. From his obituary, I learned of his caring and interest in the arts and the personal interest he had in writing poetry. I am sure I would have enjoyed his company.

The minimal association I did have with him centered around the board meetings of the Bayswater Civic Association when he was able to attend. Even in the last phase of his life he still showed his involvement in community affairs.

I would be remiss if I didn't correct the obituary on one point. Larry was not the editor of the Bayswater Breeze. Phyllis Rudnick has been and is the editor since 1991, having taken over from Manny Fox.

What was not mentioned: Larry was involved in working on the BCA website so that committee information could be made available much more quickly to our members and the community without having to wait for the quarterly Breeze to come out.

He will be missed.

HARVEY RUDNICK

Agree On Boardwalk Repair

Dear Editor,

I totally agree with your Editorial Comment on Friday July 14 about the boardwalk's condition.

It's high time to start to repair it. Also, as you said, there should have been some restrictions for using cars on the boardwalk. As I noticed the most damage is not made in the summer, as most people think, but in the winter when snow is being removed. We should rethink if removing snow from the boardwalk is worth it or just let it melt and preserve our precious walk's path for summer.

And, there is one more reflection. I don't think that making a concrete boardwalk is a good idea. The boardwalk is meant to be wooden, and that should stay. We have the concrete boardwalk not only at Beach 9 Street, but also at the other, western side of peninsula (Fort Tilden). That also is in deplorable condition, even more than the wooden boardwalk.

I wonder what other people think about this - let's ask people and make a survey!

BARBARA BLASZAK

Dayton Tower Rules

Are For All

Dear Editor:

In response to the utterly false claim by Mr. Hugh O'Hare's stating "Our flag is not safe at Dayton Towers," please consider the following facts.

First, Dayton Towers' Rules and Regulations are in print form and are given to all shareholders as part of The Lease Agreement Packet. These Rules and Regulations were established in the late 60's. Section 11 of These Rules and Regs., namely Terraces, Subsection clearly states that "....no material of any description (except our national flag) shall be permitted to be draped or hung from the terrace." This fact obviously trumps Mr. O'Hare's empty claim.

Please understand that the flagpoles one now sees at the three entranceways at Dayton Towers flying Old Glory were erected under my stewardship about a week or two before 9/11/01. It flies high and proud everyday. Given these facts, could an objective and reasonable observer honestly believe that our flag is not safe at Dayton?

In addition, I must comment on The Wave's June 30th page eight article "Support The Troops, Lose Your Parking Spot." I'm sure that many patriots reside at Dayton Towers, unlike Ms. Ann West or Mr. O'Hare, who honor and support our troops. However, Rules and Regulations apply even to patriots. Refusals or failures to adhere to long established rules usually generate a response from management. I would characterize management's response as informative rather than threatening, although the forfeiture of one's parking privileges might cause some anxiety since parking at Dayton Towers is limited and scarce. Adhering to the Rules and Regs. is usually a wise choice in view of the fact that parking at Dayton is a privilege, not an inalienable right. Of course we support our troops, and this can be done without violating rules.

In closing, I trust you may now have a clearer perspective on what is factually true and what is merely spin propagated by the seemingly misinformed or disgruntled.

If any further clarification is necessary, please do not hesitate to contact me at Dayton Towers Management Office between 10 a.m. and 2 p.m. or (718) 945-1818 at your convenience.

GERRY D'ALBORA,

DAYTON TOWERS PRESIDENT

P.S. Currently serving on the Board are Veterans of the U.S. Army, Navy, Marines and Airforce.

Get The Facts On Dayton Regulations

Dear Editor,

As a resident of Dayton Towers, I find your printing of untruths objectionable. I too, like others, am a veteran of six years service, and a simple phone call by your office would have made you understand that the American flag can be flown from the terraces at any time by as many people that care to. The leases, for lack of a better term, say so. What is not allowed are other items. So before you champion a cause that you don't have the facts on, please get them. Thank you for your time. While it may be politically incorrect, God Bless America and its Allies.

NORMAN HORNSTEIN

Another Home Torn Down

Dear Editor,

The trucks rolled in on Monday. This house was owned by Tim and Pay Lynch, 167 Beach 96 Street, for 35 years. They sold it in 2001. Another beautiful home gone, but we do expect more condos!

PAT LYNCH

Ride The Q21

Dear Editor,

I was one of the many riders who were outraged at the delays last Sunday when the bridge was left open and the broken rail the next day that left passengers stranded on hot trains. For years, the MTA has been rebuilding the tracks from Broad Channel to the peninsula and it seems nothing has ever been fixed.

But another alternative has appeared which has been a godsend. Instead of taking the S train from 116 Street to Broad Channel to connect to the A train, I've been taking the Q21 from 116 to get to Rockaway Boulevard. It takes me 25 minutes and I can transfer there and get a better chance to board an A train to the city.

The MTA, who has more information on their website, had added service on the bus line to every half hour but the buses have been empty. For people who want to shop in Howard Beach or find another way to get off the peninsula, especially when the train goes out of service, take the Q21. The peninsula has been complaining for years about adding more public transportation. It's a small step by the MTA and we can't let this opportunity slip past us or its back to the ol' drawing board and that's not good at all.

MICHAEL THOMPSON

What Lies Beneath

Dear Editor,

As passionate causes go, this by far is a very heated topic, both with pros and cons to each side and to each side their due respect. I have never been on either side of the dune fence before until now. Living on a beach block, my scenic overlook used to be the beach; now it's a hill of sand. So much for the view. In a world forever changing, and with a multitude of things to worry about, this didn't even make my list. Why the dunes were put there in the first place, let us remember the facts. It was to prevent volleyball players from playing in front of a particular house. The neighbor thought this was a great way to get rid of the volleyball players. Again, this didn't even make my list of things to worry about.

As time evolved, the bigger the dunes have become the more they have fallen into disrepair. True, the dunes do keep sand during the winter from blowing onto the street. Due to the size of the hills now, I have found there's a large amount of sand on my street already from the wind that blows the sand off from the top. I can only imagine how much sand I shall have on the street during the winter. The sand that should be on the beach is instead inherited into these hills, thus making them larger. This leaves very little beach left. We're not talking acreage here when it comes to amount of footage left for people to enjoy during the summer. I have noticed blocks east of Beach 139 Street and west of Beach 142 Street still have a large amount of beach left. Those blocks that fall between (those with the dunes) have the smallest amount of beach. Again, at this point in my life, there are other things to worry about.

So you ask, what do I worry about? As I stated in this letter, the dunes have fallen into ruins. Fences are broken, leaving fragments of twisted rusty metal about along with wood and wood posts with no regard to the removal of them. What most of the community does not realize is that buried underneath all these hills of sand are the rusty metal posts, like those that hold up street signs.

In reading previous letters regarding this matter of the dunes, true the deposit of debris that accumulates at the dunes are caused by humans and dogs that defect on the beach, not the dunes' fault. Fences that are not inspected, cared for, or maintained is the fault of those we entrust to provide a safe haven for our families.

As for the severe injury that occurred on Beach 139 Street, let me state right now, to the editor of The Wave and anyone else who looks down their noses, it was not the child's fault. Perhaps what used to be called a dune on Beach 139 Street, with no fence surrounding it, or sign to keep off of it, is a classic example of a project not maintained.

My concern as well as my worry is, given the extent of his injury, had he not fallen on his foot, but another part of his body, in my opinion, it would have killed him.

So, for something I didn't worry about before, I certainly care about it now, not only for this child's safety but for all of us.

My closing thought is I wish our children receive the same protection from the dangers on the beach as these dunes receive from the city and the community. Perhaps they need to re-evaluate their priorities.

ELIZABETH MENADE

All letters submitted to The Wave, including those sent via e-mail, must contain names, addresses and phone numbers. All letters are subject to editing and publication at the discretion of the editors. The Wave will no longer publish letters in which the name is withheld, unless, in the opinion of the editorial board, there is a compelling public interest to do so.

If you didn't see your letter this week, don't despair. The volume of letters we receive each week dictates that some be held over for the following week.

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