2004-02-27 / Columnists

Boyle-ing Points by Kevin Boyle

With A Cherry On Top

What do you call the round red lights that go with a siren? A siren makes the noise but the light by itself? I think that’s the cherry-top, right? Anyway, you know what I’m talking about. Recently, Mayor Bloomberg yanked siren and light privileges from many city officials who’ve for years have used these gimmicks to speed through traffic. Give credit to the Creature from the Black Lagoon-looking mayor on that one.

The pseudo sirens and flashing lights were a symbol of a "let them eat cake" mentality among these better-than-thou officials. But they used to symbolize something else. If my faulty memory serves, the cherry-top lights were festooned (that might be a PSAT word) on the front of certain food stores and bodegas so that the pot-buying public would know that nickel bags were on sale. Expiration dates on the milk and bread might seem historic but the ganja was good. Sometimes the only food items on display would be Goya beans and Twinkies. Those not clued in on the cherry top would naturally ask themselves—-how does this place stay in business? The mark-up on Twinkies must be unbelievable!

Of course, such naivetE9 was limited. The cherry top and empty shelves said plenty to plenty of customers. Evi dently, such in your face advertising rubbed law enforcement folks the wrong way and soon the cherry top went the way of the barber pole.

For those of you getting misty-eyed over that lost symbol of yesteryear, I am here to report that the cherry top is staging a festooning comeback. Cut ting edge nail salons (cutting edge nail salons?—-nice pun) here and there have been adorning their storefronts with the cherry tops. Could this mean a new boom in over the counter Mary Jane? Could reefer madness be back? Are we revisiting the Days of Twigs and Seeds? Not quite. Rumor has it that the salons are slipping Prozac and other anti-depressants to customers sick of the damn winter. Ah-ha! Now we know why there’s so many nail salons! It has nothing to do with fingernails! It’s a stroke of genius, really. They don’t even have to stock Twinkies.

You know the old saying, everybody complains about the weather but no body ever does anything about it (except get medicated).

Boyle-ing Over: Cops and firefighters battled each other in a hoops game last week at St. Francis. In a thriller, the Bravest edged the Finest. The place was packed and buzzing with energy. Such great events are too rare these days. Organizers and players are to be commended.

Oh, yeah, there’ll be a rematch of sorts. The FDNY and NYPD will face each other in a rugby match at Fort Tilden on Saturday, March 6 at 10:30 a.m. Get down to the Fort for some bone crushing action and a lot of fun.

**The Wave has had anniversary and holiday editions. Two weeks ago they should have warned readers that it was a PARKING or NO PARKING edition. There was so much ink about parking rules, I think some of the obituaries mentioned where the deceased stood on the issue. (PS: to those who care: I have a private drive. And I still think we should allow parking –as is—- on the Boulevard. Repeat: keep the parking as is. Of course, if it’s a done deal and No Parking is established there should be a bike lane installed. Because two-lane traffic is insane and dangerous).

**Congratulations to Frank McCar thy and Richie Knott—-two guys who’ve gone above and beyond in supporting community efforts of all kinds—-who are being honored by The Graybeards this Saturday night.

**Our congressman, Anthony Weiner, was a guest on Dennis Miller’s new cable show last Sunday. He’s been on Bill O’Reilly, various MSNBC shows, and Hannity and Colmes. He’s clearly got a thing for going on cable. We’ll know he’s made the big time when he gets some time on John Baxter’s show.

**When winter’s this awful it’s hard to remember there’s actually a beach up the block. But some dog owners apparently have no such memory lapse. In fact, they remember this is the perfect time of year to walk their dogs on the beach. The only forgetfulness some have is picking up after their dogs. It’s a minefield. Let the crap on the beach protests begin!


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