2003-06-13 / Columnists

Boyle-ing Points by Kevin Boyle

A Funny Thing Happened
Boyle-ing Points by Kevin Boyle A Funny Thing Happened

I didn’t want to rain on everybody’s parade––there’s been way too much of that lately between Mother Nature and the ticket blitz––but I did try to provide a clue about the third leg of the Triple Crown. Careful readers (both of you) noticed that my last column had no mention of Funny Cide and his Triple Crown chances. The obvious omission was a tip to stay away from the much ballyhooed odds-on favorite. From what I hear, a number of Wave readers cashed winning tickets––some bought new summer houses with the newfound riches––after getting betting advice right here before the Kentucky Derby several weeks back. Of course, all the people who thanked me (but didn’t offer a cut on the winnings) were luckier than they know. They misread the column (they’re to be forgiven since I miswrite the column all the time). See, I had actually picked Ten Most Wanted and then went on to suggest that Funny Cide would be a decent pick as well because a certain overnight delivery driver known as Saratoga Suntan was suddenly and cleverly calling himself Fun-tan––an obvious reference to the New York-bred gelding. Hmmm, I thought. Better put a few clams on Funny Cide, too. The dude’s got good info. Behind those glasses and the blue jumpsuit is a peerless pony prognosticator.

So yep, I made a few bucks and then made a few more in the Preakness. You’d think I’d ride Funny Cide the whole way, heh? Nope. Remember the Derby controversy? Remember the jockey was accused of zapping his horse with an electrical buzzer on the stretch run? He was exonerated with everybody but me. Actually I gave him the benefit of the doubt, too, but then I started thinking about the rain. Of course, everybody liked the idea that Funny Cide would be racing on his hometown track. But did they think about the forecast, as I did? Rain, water, wet stuff would a mean muddy track––but that was no concern to me. No, it was rain mixing with that electric zapper. It was one thing for the jockey to use that electric buzzer on the horse’s butt on those sunny days at Churchill Downs and at the Preakness. But when I saw that rain was in the forecast for the Belmont, I figured there’s no way the jockey’s gonna risk electrocuting himself. Time to eye another horse. And then, what do I hear on the grapevine? I hear Fun-Tan, while making deliveries, was now calling himself Fun Maker––an obvious reference to Empire Maker. Hmmm, I thought. Before you could say Secretariat, I jumped off the Funny Cide bandwagon. Sometime you gotta read tea leaves, sometimes you just listen to what the Horse Honcho is calling himself.

**Hey, great article on local baseball talent Richard George in last week’s Wave. It’s quite rare for a Rockaway lad to make the leap from high school baseball to Division 1 on the college level. Rockaway has had many luminaries in basketball and track (and a few in soccer, football, and swimming) but baseball––maybe because it cuts into surfing––is something few Rockawayites excel at. After a standout career at Loyola High School in Manhattan, Richard will be playing for St. Peter’s College in Jersey City. Here’s hoping we see him in the Bronx, one day. Way to go, Richard.

**One of the great Rockaway traditions takes place this Saturday––the Sevens Tournament hosted by Rockaway Rugby (the Fish Heads) at Fort Tilden. It’s a great festival-like atmosphere with great action. You don’t have to have a clue about rugby to enjoy the heck out of the day. This annual event is the largest Summer 7’s tournament on the East Coast and regularly draws up to 50 teams.

**City Councilman Joe Addabbo is having a meeting at the Beach Club on Monday evening, June 16. The public is invited. That might be the time to let Joe know how you feel about using the beach. Let’s see, you can’t jog on the boardwalk unless it’s a "lawful" time of day, and you can’t ride your bike. Better to take the gas guzzling SUV to the store or library SUV than take your bike along the boardwalk. Or are bikes supposed to use Rockaway Beach boulevard which when not under construction is simply too dangerous? Of course, you might be asked to conserve energy should the summer ever come ––don’t use your air conditioner—-but you better not sit on the boardwalk to cool off at night either. What else, you can’t use floatation devices in the water. You can’t, you can’t, you can’t. Joe, what can we do?

**Howard Schwach for Congress? If you read last week’s Bag of Mail, you know there’s a serious grassroots draft Howie Schwach movement afoot. My reaction? Hey, I’d make him President if he’s give up writing for The Wave. Only joshing, Howie. I’m all for it (though I think Howie’s better as a gadfly). The way I see it—my delivery man was gave me a tip––Anthony Weiner runs for mayor, and yep, Joe Addabbo runs for Weiner’s seat. Bet the rent on it.


Return to top


Email Us
Contact Us

Copyright 1999 - 2014 Wave Publishing Co. All Rights Reserved

Neighborhoods | History