2003-03-29 / Sports

Are The Brooklyn FDNY Hoops Breaking Up?

Are The Brooklyn FDNY Hoops Breaking Up?

Are The Brooklyn FDNY Hoops Breaking Up?


The FDNY Brooklyn Hoops in happier times with Chairman of the Board, Mr. C and Rockaway Fishhead legend Oakie. They’re still looking for Scottie.The FDNY Brooklyn Hoops in happier times with Chairman of the Board, Mr. C and Rockaway Fishhead legend Oakie. They’re still looking for Scottie.

The third annual Brooklyn FDNY Basketball Dinner Dance was held last week at the Harbor Light amid much controversy and team dissention. Rockaway’s favorite son, Kevin "Coach Flathead" Coursey was seen furiously working the phone demanding to know why 2/3 of the squad boycotted the dinner dance/awards ceremony. Fines, suspensions, and cuts are imminent and the proverbial bullseye is growing.

Team management is quoted saying only center Chewbacca "Joe Dirt" Downing’s absence was cleared with the team after he was detailed to the Duke University Wight Loss Clinic. This was after his horrific performance last month against "Big Red" of the NYPD All- Stars at the charity game in St. Francis Gym. He is recovering well in Tar-Hell country but the clinic cannot keep Subway sandwiches long enough for his appetite.

Jack "Gabrielle Reese" Bradley unexcused showing at the awards dinner was evident after he was called up for two awards: Defensive Player of the Year and the S.H. Shot Award. Rumor has Jack last seen in Soho having brunch with a French couple discussing world events. The tradewinds are swirling around Coppersmith’s Pub. Get a weighted vest Jack.

Kevin "B.B." Murphy tearfully announced his retirement. Kevin hangs up his shoes with an undefeated record as starting playmaker. Good job Murph, and good luck as Mr. Mom. This might be the opening to get Tommy "Cutey-Pie" Murphy signed to another 10-day contract. However, he was overheard boasting at the DeSales charity game that he should be starting since he’s better than half the team anyway. Management is scratching its head.

Greg "N.H. Hearn is attempting to improve his rapidly decaying hand-eye coordination this week down in South Beach, Miami. Hearn is studying Zen philosophy on the East Coact beach practicing Pilates on the sand. Danny "Claender Hunk" Keane and the S.I. crew blew off the awards dinner complaining about their high EZ pass bills. The Staten Island quartet has definitely distanced themselves socially from the team. Could their apathy towards the Brooklyn club mean expansion of another FDNY hoop team? Will the team unify before they land on the chopping block? Stay tuned!!!

Steve Collins found a new home in South Boston for their St. Patrick’s Day Parade. He was helpful with Pro bie Schweiger and his grandmother in the Black Rose. The team is still undecided about defending its gold medal at the next World Fire/Police Games this June in Barcelona with the current world conditions and military action taken by the U.S.

The F.D.N.Y. Brooklyn Club is very proud of power broker and team supporter Ed "Don’t Call Me Eggy" Tolan. He took time from his very busy social calendar and his busy schedule working with Fox-5 as Evan Marriott’s Body Double to help orchestrate and spearhead the pro- U.S. armed forces rally in Times Square on Sunday. Ed was a man possessed rallying people together for the troops. Great job, Ed, now take a week off to unwind. Anyway, till next time, Bottoms Up and Calm Down.


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