Waldheim Report On Softball
By Corinne Waldheim
The last Jamaica Bay Softball season of the millennium came to a close last Sunday. It was a season that was filled with determination, as well as disparity. Once there was a time when each year would welcome the return of fully intact teams and long-running rivals. It seems this year’s angst was aimed more toward umpires than opposing teams.
The weather was perfect last Sunday. But sundown came early for the Roundballs, Broad Channel residents and mosquitoes, in that order. Game one was a 14-8 victory for the Cardinals, scoring 10 runs in the first. Steven James was 3-4 with a triple. Leo Chavanne was 3-3 and Moonie was 2-3. They were followed by John Didio and Kevin Harnischer, 2-4.
For the Roundballs, Chris Knott, Buddy Schultz and Keith Wolken were 3-3. Dave Cook and Bobby Regan were 2-3 and 2-4, respectively. Schultz also had a two-RBI double.
Game two was not as easy. While the Cardinals brought talent to the plate, the key to the Championship laid in the hands of the defense. Chavanne turned a few double plays and an all around dominance at short. The pitching was at its best once again. Steve Keller recorded the final out of the B-Division Championship with a routine catch in left. The bench was seemed uncharacteristically quiet, but only until I realized that Gator was a no-show. I guess he couldn’t find anything to wear.
Seven of 10 batters combined to go 10-17, belting five-straight hits in the sixth. But the Roundballs still came up short.
Channelites were forced into their homes at about 5 p.m. when helicopters invaded the airspace armed with huge doses of bug repellent. Yankee fan and a mayor, Rudy Guiliani said that although the spray is safe everyone should lock themselves in their homes and close all the windows for a few hours. My buddy Nicole can tell you that I was a mess. I yelled at her to get home and batten down the hatches. My friend Lori, from work, told me that a third eye might help my unborn children someday. Now, now I said unborn children and I don’t plan on having any for a several years so lets not start any rumors.
League stalwarts like the Pirates and Publicans were absent from the scene. Rumors emerged early that some Pirates would stow away on another seagoing vessel next season. Charlie Kinzie overcame (or maybe just withstood) injury to join the Publicans. They left the diamond almost as quickly as they came. Dicko also succumbed to injury but ran columns in the Wave like a marathon. The Wave might actually consider renaming the sports section "The Dicko Section," based on the percentage of ink Dickesheid utilizes.
Here are my millennium predictions:
- Dicko will return, but not until the 2001 season, and take Kevin Boyle’s job as Sports Editor (just kidding KB.
- The team who wins the Championship will be a totally new team made up of guys from all over the league and league rookies…and I will coach it (in my perfect world).
- The league will return to its East/West, single Championship roots.
- Meatball will get thrown out (if he returns) of at least four games.
- Gator will design the All-star shirts and get a job with Calvin Klein, where they will provide him with his very own sewing machine.
- The Mets will win at least three World Series’ before 2005.
- Doc will cut an inch off his long flowing locks.
- Diver will finally crack and replace the Beach field with quicksand.
- Umpires will take my advice and were bulletproof vests.
- Ed Burns will film another movie, this time in Broad Channel and call it "No Looking Back, II."
I will attempt to make a return appearance over the winter, possibly the week after the Mets win the World Series. Hope to see lots of new faces and teams next season.